have u ever been in a mood to destroy your relationship with everyone you know
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I didn’t deserve you…
“Good Morning Beautiful” were your daily texts
“You complete me. You’re my Queen. I love you” usually came next.
I would giggle. I would smile. I would cover my face with my hands and hide
Because this was all new to me and I didn’t know how to reply.
Videos of you lip singing love songs always made my day,
And when we had our skype dates when you were 1,614 miles away.
Dream catchers, books, weekend trips and my favorite teddy bear
Simple nights when we just laid up and you played in my hair.
Sadly, it seemed I took you for granted because I couldn’t grasp the concept of love.
But that wasn’t my intention. Every expectation you had of me, I fell short of.
And then you stopped doing everything because you didn’t feel appreciated
When in reality, I just couldn’t communicate it.
This wasn’t fair to you.
I should’ve told you how I felt and say you were my king,
My best friend, my confidant, and how I never wanted you to leave me.
Somehow I always ended up saying the wrong thing and pushing you away,
When there was nothing more I wanted than for you to stay.
Letting you go
My fingers ache to touch you. And my lips crave your kisses. My heart longs for a love that lasts a lifetime. Our love. And my mind screams as I let you go. But I can’t stop myself. I’m not strong enough. Everything that’s happening to me feels stronger than I am. And for a while I thought, our love would make it alright. It would be my safe place. But all illusions must shatter. So here I stand, walking away from you. Not because you’re not enough. You are. But I don’t know if I am. So this time, I need you to let me go. I need you to believe that I’m not letting you go. I’m just finding myself. And when I’ve found myself, maybe, just maybe, I’ll learn to love myself too.
- To the anon who wanted me to write a breakup letter. Hope this meets your needs. Sending lots of love your way :)
The more anger towards the past you carry in your heart, the less capable you are of loving in the present.